In the distance...

The family that slays together, stays together.
Stay vigilant, may the infection never reach you, and those close to you have the resolve to do what is needed should you be so unfortunate, Mike D.

Zombies in film: Dead Snow

"Ein! Zwei! Die!"

Film: Dead Snow

Directed by Tommy Wirkola

Written by Tommy Wirkola and Stig Henriksen

Produced by Euforia Film, Barentsfilm As, and Miho Film

Story: The group of collage students go up to a cabin in the woods (sound familiar? The film does pay homeage to the classics which take place in similar settings.) Only to find a treasure chest full of Nazi gold! A crazed old man warns them of Nazi Zombies that guard the area and that they should leave. Of course paying the old man no heed the young adults go about their partying ways until all hell suddenly breaks loose and bloody battle comences.

Zombies: The zombies in this film are a mystical/secentific secret weapon made by those crazy Nazis during the war. They are fast, can fight to some extent and follow a leader. Let's talk about the leader first, he is a Nazi commander and his sole purpose is to protect this gold it would seem. The other zombies seem to have just enough intelligence to do what he wants them to (without orders being issued.) Which I suppose makes some sort of sense since these are some sort of mystical zombies. All in all these aren't your typical zombies but they are relatively dumb, they are bad at fighting, and they transfer the infection through bites which when not under orders from the commander seems to be their only goal (that is a little back to normal.) The zombies are also not killed by blows to the head, they are killed in basically any way that would kill a human. Oddly however all of these things that clearly make them not true zombies can be over looked (to some degree) in this film, maybe because they are Nazis, maybe because the film rests in that middle ground between poor-indy film and blockbuster, who knows, I should but I don't.

Survival Lessons:

• Don't set up a tent in an area you know has zombies in it,  in fact don't stay in an area you warn others to leave because of zombies.
• Don't let zombies get near your nads.
• Don't steal.
• Esspecially don't steal 50 year old treasure chests of Nazi gold.
• Mandatory military service does come in handy for preparing the average person.
• Your vehicle can always be a weapon.
• If you can't aim, don't throw Molotov Cocktails.
• Girls suck at fighting zombies (apparently.)

Warnings: Parts of this movie get absurd and a little disturbing in the name of "humor."

In the end this movie is entertaining and to be fair it was 2AM when I watched it and I had been doing special effects for four hours. So I am taking this into account when passing judgement. I have a few issues with the movie and it does not deserve all the fame it is getting in the zombie world. Everything is exactly what you would expect from a medium budget movie, so I wouldn't say it was bad or good. It was basically right in the middle of the road. It had some great moments, like two guys running into a horde of zombies and slaughtering them two at a time; or a blue-eyed handsome Norweign man fighting zombies regardless of his wounds and bravely sewing up the bites on his neck. But it also had its awful moments, like very obvious special effects during a few fights, poor humor and a predicable story. I will give them props however for choosing to do a story set in winter in the mountains: it offers a lot of challenges as a film maker but also means very few chances to have girls strip down and get the "sex appeal" so many films -regardless of budget- try to rely on without realizing every other film has done the same thing and no matter what the internet or real life will always do it better.

Stay frosty, may the infection never reach you, and those close to you have the resolve to do what is needed should you be so unfortunate, Mike D.

Zombies in film: Resident Evil

“Survive the horror.”

Film: Resident Evil

Directed by Paul W. S. Anderson

Written by Paul W. S. Anderson

Produced by Constantin Film Produktion, Davis-Films, Impact Pictures and New Legacy

Story: Adding to the mythology of this long running video game series, Resident Evil follows the story of Alias. A super soldier actually never named in the movie. The story of Alias and RE is very long and twisted and if you want to go into it quite a deep dive. But the story of them ovie is fairly simple. A team of Umbrella Soldiers go into a secret Umbrella building called the Hive to find out what went wrong. What went wrong is everyone turned into zombies. Alias is the soldier who was supposed to protect the mansion which serves as the entrance to the Hive. She is taken in with the team along with another man and a second man is found on the way in. These two men turn out to be part of Alias discovering her involvment in the project and trying to bring down Umbrella. Zombies, zombie dogs and Lickers (though the movie calls them Hunters) make for a very entertaining and undead filled flick.

Zombies: The zombies in this film come in three varities, much like the games the virus creates mutated versions of itself, resulting in the "Hunter" called a "Licker" in the games. This creature has an incredibly long and powerful tongue, along with huge claws that can rip through metal. The creature changes and grows as it consumes fresh DNA. Then there are zombie dogs, which some argue are possible and some argue are not. And of course normal zombies. These zombies are fairly inconsistent for being in one film. Some times they go straight for the survivors, sometimes they disapear with no explaination. The most realistic thing about them is the amount. Where there is any more then one or two zombies there are scores of zombies. And then surprise! If you look deeper into the Wesker Reports Alias' past (and future) is revealed in an interesting way.

Survival Lessons:

• If all hope seems lost, take a step back. Literally.
• Never give up on someone left for dead.
• If you warn someone that you will shoot them, and they keep coming, and you shoot them, and they keep coming, shoot them in the head, a lot.
• Shutting off the power is not always the best idea.
• You're never safe.
• If there is a cure and you're infected, it's probably too late anyway.
• If you haven't been infected there is always hope.
• Never trust corporations.
• Don't turn your back on an opening door.

Warnings: The sequels are very disapointing.

In the end this movie is an excellent addition to the zombie world. The T-virus is the perfect example of any number of real viruses being change into a bio-weapon by a corporation. It shows a fairly good course of events in which even the most elite soldiers can fall. In adition to all of this it is a fairly entertaining movie as well.

Until next time, may the infection never reach you, and those close to you have the resolve to do what is needed should you be so unfortunate,

Mike D.

True test

What would you do in another actual outbreak? There is really only one way to find out, to be in one. Or is that the only way?

This hypnotist takes zombies to another level and puts a man inside of a video game. An experience I believe is invaluable as it would truly test how a person would respond to actual zombies.

The integrity of the internet is in the user however and you can look at this however you wish. There are sites out there who prove it is fake and sites who prove it is real. As with everything decide for yourself.

Incase some of you don't know what's happening, the hypnotist creates a video game which will put about one in three players into a sleeping state. He then takes that player to the warehouse the game was made to look like and gives him a somewhat real looking compressed airgun and wakes the man up. Then the zombies start coming.

As I stated before, you can see how this would be the ultimate test of a person's response to real zombies. As with many things like this I have to say lucky for the zombie actors that this man wasn't a crack shot or a well trained martial artist. The first would have quickly seen through the veil and the second could have seriously hurt someone. This man on the other hand would obviously not survive even a few hours after the fall, rather he would be among the horde seeking out true survivors.

Stay awake, may the infection never reach you, and those close to you have the resolve to do what is needed should you be so unfortunate, Mike D.

February poll

Check if anyone you know was involved, or knows someone involved.	2 (28%)
Go zombie hunting!	1 (14%)
Hide in your panic room.	1 (14%)
Grab a few extra supplies like bottled water and canned foods.	4 (57%)
Search out someone directly involved and get the details.	1 (14%)
Gather your friends together to hide in your panic room.	1 (14%)
Inform the people you trust what the situation is.	4 (57%)
Keep a close eye on the news.	3 (42%)
Ignore any suggestions this may not have been zombies.	1 (14%)

Check if anyone you know was involved, or knows someone involved.
This is one of the first steps involved in determining what exactly happened and where the infected may have come from or gone too. It will also be important to find out if these people had been attacked during the outbreak.

Go zombie hunting!
A Class 1 outbreak does not mean open season on the undead. For one, a Class 1 does not pose a huge threat if it is kept in check and there will be a limited number of infected. Second and more important, the law does not acknowledge zombie slaying and killing of zombies in a small scale will be observed as murder. Best left to nonlethal means unless absolutely necessary.

Hide in your panic room.
Panic rooms are for emergency situations to protect yourself for a limited time. If the outbreak were to be Class 2 or heaven forbid Class 3 the panic room would be a good idea to hide it out or even to stay safe for the first few days or a Class 4. But would be relatively pointless in a Class 1.

Grab a few extra supplies like bottled water and canned foods.
Never a bad idea. In this case a great idea.

Search out someone directly involved and get the details.
Very similar to the first option. The difference is this involves actively going searching out and contacting someone who was in the outbreak himself.

Gather your friends together to hide in your panic room.
If going to the panic room alone was extreme, this is the icy on the cake.

Inform the people you trust what the situation is.
This can be the hardest thing to do as a survivor but it must be done, the ones really worth the trust will accept what you have to stay and at least humor the possibility of danger.

Keep a close eye on the news.
This is a must. Don't just watch one station or website but look at as many different feeds from the area as you can find. It is important to note much of this information will not be the truth but if sometimes you can find something that isn't completely false or hidden.

Ignore any suggestions this may not have been zombies.
Well... if this is the course of action taken after an outbreak being confirmed the person who does this will not survive very long after the fall.

Once an outbreak is reasonably certain to be a Class 1 it is important to know as much about it as possible. This is still an information gathering phase. The reason being is that unless directly involved there is no way to be 100% of anything, outbreak status, number of infected involved, termination of all infected, etc. There is no call as of yet to begin searching out the infected as local law enforcement or those on hand can likely handle the situation. If they cannot handle it the person gathering information will hopefully see the signs of a bigger Class 2 or even 3 outbreak before it begins. And those signs are the cue to begin taking a little more extensive measures.

Stay vigilant, may the infection never reach you, and those close to you have the resolve to do what is needed should you be so unfortunate, Mike D.